Affair with the boss/misconduct at work


#1

I spent four years in Korea. My boss started making sexual advances towards me. In the beginning, I refused him, later I did not. We did not have sex, but did kiss etc. This lasted 2 weeks until his wife found out.

On his side, he completely changed the story, and he blames everything on me. He said that we never kissed etc. He also made up lies that I was a horrible employee to protect himself. This is also not true. He denies any sexual relations at all.

On my side, I would simply say that I left work because of sexual harassment. The end. I wouldnt disclose any sexual relaitonship either. However, I fear that investigators will contact my previous boss and his wife. I don’t know if I should just withdraw my application? Could I ask them not to contact my boss? I am also beyond embarassed that there would be a record of this. Your expertise is kindly appreciated.

Lastly, i was planning to join a womens organization for sexual harassment and be a speaker there to show that I am doing something. would this help?


#2

Based on what you have listed it appears that you left employment, either involuntarily or voluntarily, because of this conduct. Either way you should disclose the fact that you had issues at this job. That way it does not appear that you are trying to hide anything, which would be worse for you. My guess is that your former boss will not jeopardize his own career further by dragging your name through the mud. I also advise you seek help to come to terms with what happened you so you can move on from this.